Life 13 years after surgery

I (25F) had scoliosis surgery for an 80-90 curve at 12 years old, I just have to vent because even to this day all I can wish for is a life without the mental damage that is scoliosis.

Looking at these post surgery pictures, all I can do is cry because my back is still at a 20-30 degree curve and my ribs have never straightened themselves out, so I feel it doesn’t even look like I had surgery done. Everyone comments how “straight” their back looks now and mine is still obviously deformed. This has caused me a lifetime of self image issues and mental illness. 13 years later I can’t even stand to look at my body in the mirror without wanting to throw up. I feel like I’m living a nightmare that I could just wake up from. Not to mention, I still deal with chronic pain.

My boyfriend and family just diminish my issues and say it’s all in my head how I look and I “need to get over it”, but I don’t think I ever will. I’m wondering if there’s anyone who can relate?

Thank you for reading this far if you did, I just needed to vent into the void a little bit.